Bullying - The Fine Art of Brute Force and Terror

When I was in grade 4 I was bullied. I had a big mouth and that probably didn't help but the bullying was pretty severe with multiple children beating me up on a regular basis. Once I even got pushed against a tree and ended up with a broken branch poking me in the back. I didn't really get injured but I was scared to go to school. Grade 7 though was the worst.

My chief antagonist got together with 10 other kids and beat me in a ditch beside a fence out of sight of the teachers from the school. I was kicked and punched, spat on and even had my face rammed into prickle bushes and a chain link fence before other kids intervened.

I remember the terror of waiting in hiding for my Mom everyday to pick me up from the school. When I saw her car I ran for it and felt safe. I dreaded school back then but eventually the bullying slowed and while it never left entirely it did become manageable and I even learned to defend myself somewhat.

The effects of the bullying linger to this day. I am grossly intolerant of bullying on any level and often intervene when I probably shouldn't. I once got a badly sprained ankle defending someone who was getting pummeled by a larger man. I have gotten in trouble at work for occasionally defending people that work for me a little too vociferously when I felt they were being bullied by higher ranking members of the company I work for. I am quick to jump in when I probably shouldn't as I hate bullying so much. I even got in a shouting match in a supermarket as I felt that someone was bullying my wife. Embarrassing but that's my legacy. I suppose the flip side is that my children will be nicer kids as I won't let them bully and I will try to prepare them to cope with bullying though it won't be easy.

I thought there was nothing worse than being bullied when I was a kid but I was wrong. Watching your children get bullied is much much worse. My parents must have had a horrible time letting me out of their site when they knew what I was in for. Unfortunately now I am experiencing it for myself.

As we have seen in the news bullying has gotten much worse since I was a kid. In my day you would get a black eye or a bruise, now kids are dying. The Columbine massacre showed what can happen if bullying is left unchecked.

My son is being bullied by a kid in the neighborhood, and as a parent there isn't much one can do. I would love to intervene physically but alas that would get me thrown in jail so I am forced to talk to the bully's parents. The parents are uncooperative at best and there are (as is often the case) a myriad of issues within that family that have contributed to the inappropriate behaviour.

The bullying started with pushing and hitting and scaring but has escalated to a point where further action must be taken. The bully in question threatened to kill my son by slitting his throat with the sharpened lid of a tin can. My son was a quick thinker and grabbed the weapon and placed it in his pocket at which point the bully covered my sons mouth and tried to hold him down but my wife saw and I charged in to set things right. Then there was rock throwing and chasing and after consulting other parents in the area I discovered that he used a knife and did a similar thing to another child. While no one has been seriously injured yet I fear for the safety of my son, and other kids nearby.

This child has sworn at my wife and wrote graffiti on my back step. He has taken things form my shed and broken toys from the neighborhood children and last night after intervention by the police was seen outside again, breaking items taken from people's porches nearby. Clearly the bully is a serious menace but what can I do about it?

Nothing

The Police can't do much and other agencies are slow to act but if I get involved I could risk charges myself so my son ends up being a prisoner in his own home. The most frightening aspect to this whole situation?

The bully is only 7 years old.

Imagine what he will be like at 17

Until next time remember, no Payne no gain.