Blogger Buffet - Grocery Stores, Untold Stories of the ER and Madonna

Some days I can't think of anything to blog about. I sit and surf the net trying desperately to find something that I find interesting enough to comment on. Sometimes it doesn't work out very well (Tim Hortons blog). Well today I had no problem at all, in fact I have enough stuff to save some for another day. So where do I start?

Grocery Store Fun - I am always entertained when I visit the grocery store, but then I get distracted by small shiny objects too. One of the things I find amusing is the tactical reconnaissance you have to do when you are ready to go pay. You know what I am talking about, you start checking the various lines to see who has how much in their cart, how fast the clerk is and how many old ladies are in the line. Oh come on! Old ladies take forever and have a thousand coupons and have to make small talk with the checkout girls. I search for the line with the guys in it, guys just pay and go, if there is a guy working the checkout even better, no chatter. Sometimes it's faster to avoid the 'express' checkouts since everyone lines up there. Once you get to the checkout it can be boring but one thing cracks me up every time. When I start putting my stuff on the conveyor belt and the person in front of me frantically slaps down the divider. What are they afraid of? Uh oh! What if you accidentally pay for my can of ravioli?! Pulease! I never use the dividers, I enjoy making other people in front and behind me feel uncomfortable. There is one thing I don't like though and that's when I get to the checkout and they check my air miles card so they know what to call me...that's not even my name on the card stop calling me that! It drives me mental. Oh well I almost have enough Airmiles to fly from Winnipeg to...well the other side of Winnipeg.

Untold Stories of the E.R. - TLC has some awesome shows! One of the shows is Untold Stories of the ER and it basically is about strange things that happen in hospital emergency rooms. There was the usual stuff with bullet wounds, and drug overdoses but the grossest one was a homeless lady that had infected wounds on her arms. Not a big deal right? except...THERE WERE LIVING WORMS PACKED AWAY IN THE WOUNDS! GROOOOOOSSSSS! Like actual living earthworms, dozens of them too, and she wasn't just 'storing' them. she named them too. All of them. Could you imagine somebody with worms stored in gaping wounds in their arms?! I am gonna puke! I know one of my readers will puke too! (She's a sympathy puker, you know who you are). I think from now on I will stick with 'What not to Wear' or 'Miami Ink.' Yeech! Blech, gag!

Madonna - She is a cultural icon and pop megastar and has, over the years, certainly provided society with things to talk about. From her book 'Sex' to her mock crucifixion, to her movie 'Truth or Dare' the Material Girl has not shied away from anything. Madge's latest endeavour was to go to Africa, (A little late aren't you? I thought Bono and George Clooney have already beat you to it) and donate money to a village there. I don't know if it's the air in Africa or what, but she pulled an Angelina and adopted a kid. You know I have occasionally bought something on impulse, like a videogame or a ball cap, or even a stereo, but a KID?! What's up with that? The worst part is the kid already has a Dad! Apparently the family is a little upset...Duh! I just don't get the whole celebrity kid boutique thing. Why not provide money to help families raise their own kids? I don't know but maybe Madonna should get her kid (Lourdes) a puppy instead of a pet human?

UFC 64 Unstoppable Results - Some guys won, and some guys lost but the shocking thing was what happened to (now former) Champ Rich Franklin. Not only did he lose, he was dominated! Anderson Silva rearranged his face with devastating knees so bad that when Franklin stood up after the fight got stopped his nose was smashed and pushed over so far I am sure he could smell his own ear! Ouch! I love the sport but watching a guy get a nose job from another mans knees makes my eyes water. I pity the next guy that faces Anderson Silva, he might need a few breathe-right airstrips.

I got more but I better save 'em for a rainy day. Now go to your local grocery store and see how fast the person in front of you slaps down the divider. Now that I brought it up you will never be able to get it out of your mind. Now if you'll excuse me I have to go check for worms.

Until next time remember, no Payne, no gain!